The Sweep, Week 1: We Waited All Summer (Spring, Winter) For This?

 

Aaand hello, welcome to season 2 of The Sweep, where we predict the weekend's games in what should be the Big Ten West, but isn't.

2025 was a fairly "meh" season for our five teams. Even 4-8 Wisconsin managed to beat Washington and put the fear of God into a couple other teams, though something tells me there are at least two reasons that won't happen to the Badgers' Week 1 opponent in 2026.

Elsewhere, in Week 0 (which I continue to loathe), UNC actually beat a team with a pulse and Florida State beat New Mexico State but absolutely did not look good doing so. In the only Big Ten game from Week Nothing, USC roughed up San Jose State in a game that wasn't as close as the score indicated. Mike Norvell and Lincoln Riley are not yet to the "don't buy green bananas" stage of their tenures but the early returns suggest the later returns had better look a whole bunch better.

As for us, let us look at the games of Week 1, such as they are.

Eastern Illinois at Minnesota (Thursday, 7 pm Central, NBCSN/Peacock): I think Minnesota is perfectly happy with the rut PJ Fleck and the Gophers are stuck in: perpetually 6-6 or 7-5, never beating Iowa unless the refs screw up, and going to a bowl game. It's not a bad rut, really. It fills the stands. 

The 2026 Gophers will be expected to evolve on offense and show more power than they've shown in the previous few seasons, when the team has largely been carried by its defense. But, as is typical for these Week 1 games, the opponent will likely provide little challenge. EIU has sent Sean Payton, Tony Romo, and Jimmy ... [Googles] ... Garoppolo to the NFL, but you wouldn't know it by the Panthers' dearth of on-field success. Minnesota 41, EIU 10.

UAB at Illinois (Thursday, 8 pm Central, BTN): Life is too short to attempt to understand UAB football. Alabama is a talent-rich state. The Blazers should be better than they are. But all football in Bama defers to, well, 'Bama. It's easy to think that in this era any school is just a pile of NIL money away from being competitive, but that's probably not the case and, at any rate, UAB can't afford it.

Illinois? Yeah, they can. Sort of. Illinois 38, UAB 13.

By University of Alabama at Birmingham - www.uab.edu, Public Domain, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=149359006

Know Your Non-Conference Tomato Can: University of Alabama at Birmingham

Located on a surprisingly large downtown campus in Alabama's largest city, UAB is a relatively young school that has only existed since the late 1960s. While it is a broad spectrum comprehensive university, health care professions are a particular strength. It has colleges of medicine, dentistry, and optometry. While still essentially a commuter school, those health care programs and the urban location are beginning to draw students from further away. Football success has been a different story, with UAB actually dropping football for a couple years in the mid-2010s. Obvoiusly, however, it's back now. Notable UAB alumni include ... I told you it's a very young university, right?

Ohio at Nebraska (Saturday, 11 am, FS1): Playing for Frank Solich's honor, I suppose. I met him once. Nice guy, Small enough that I can't believe he played fullback.

Nebraska did not dazzle in 2025 but was, at the bare minimum, a competent football team. Things might have ended better if Dylan Raiola hadn't broken his leg three-quarters of the way through the season, but he did, and now he plays for Oregon. UNLV transfer Anthony Colandrea will now take the snaps. Here's hoping he fares better than his former team did in Week Cipher. Nebraska 40, Ohio 20.

Northern Illinois at Iowa (Saturday, 3:15 pm, BTN): Hawkeye fans with long-enough memories certainly recall that Northern Illinois has beaten Iowa before, back in 2013, in .... Week [null]. That NIU team finished 12-0 before eating dirt in the MAC title game and the Poinsettia Bowl. NIU quarterback Jordan Lynch finished third in the Heisman voting that year as well.

So the best-ever NIU football team edged Iowa by a figgie in a week that shouldn't even exist. I am aware of the past. I am not overly concerned, as I do believe Iowa will pick up where it left off last season. No, as of this writing, we don't know the identity of Iowa's starting quarterback. Convince me it matters. Iowa 35, NIU 17.

Notre Dame vs. Wisconsin (at Lambeau Field, Sunday, 6:30 pm, NBC/Peacock): I kind of already covered this game in the Wisconsin preview, where I said that it's highly doubtful Wisconsin can win against the legitimate national title contending Irish, even though Sconnie tends to punch above its weight at Lambeau. I also said the Badgers don't really need to win, they just need to show up on a big stage and give the Irish a fight. That will be enough to show that things are different in Madison this season. And I think Luke Fickell can make that happen.

Low-key, though, I love the thought of the joint Irish/Chicago Bears fandom, which is huge, being forced to watch another game at Lambeau. Take heart; I hear the Bears will be playing in South Bend pretty soon anyways. Notre Dame 34, Wisconsin 18.

Atari Pac-Man image: Wikimedia Commons